The F Word – Don’t let it have the power of measuring our womanhood
Aisha Agina is a Writer and student at Humber College
Tuesday, march 3, 2015
Femininity. In our culture, a trait is viewed “feminine” if it is often associated with women. It’s used to describe a group of characteristics such as being verbal and communicative, emotional or effusive, being nurturing and having an appreciation for beautiful or aesthetically pleasing things. This is what I call the F word.
On the other hand, “masculinity” is often used when describing men. Masculinity is seen as a character trait that involves with being competitive or aggressive, being physically built, physical or using firm force. The way I see it is that these are general human traits, and regardless of the gender, we all express a combination of traits from both the feminine and masculine categories.
As for me, I am currently enrolled in college full time, and school alone can take up most of your time. In the morning, my main goals are to sleep in as much as I can, then get ready as fast as possible and walk out the door. I don’t have the time to do my hair or put on make-up. Does that make me less feminine in the eyes of others now?
I would say, that for the age, I am particularly a busy woman. I make every decision, pay every bill, drive myself everywhere, and considerably a personal chauffeur to many people that don’t have their own ways to get around – it’s all completely de-feminizing.
A slew of recent stories making the headlines focus on modern society’s obsessed with looks – women’s looks – to the point where it is suggested to not praise a young girls’ beauty because they will start to develop body image issues. Advertising agencies still largely prefer to use airbrushed models; in many cases, women are still objectified as sex objects and defined by their looks.
If we aren’t considered feminine enough, then the reflection of ourselves begins to degrade. But who is to tell us if we are “feminine enough”? The men that we so call try to impress? Many think that the overall view of femininity is based on being pretty. How do you be femininely pretty you ask? Well, it seems to be simple to what modern society has taught us. You must be meticulous in your clothing, make-up, and skin. Your skin should appear to be clean, fresh, and nice all the time. Don’t forget, you must stay cool, calm and collective.
Even with all my femininity, it is sad to say that I am no longer a girl since I burp in public, eat faster than you can roll your pasta around your fork, and forgetting to wax my moustache on a regular basis.
Let me not forget to say that, to men a woman that is considered unfeminine is thought to be the most unattractive trait they can find. I could say that out of all things, cigarettes have to be named the number one turn off to men. Another question may I ask is, WHY DO MEN ALWAYS THINK WE ARE TRYING TO IMPRESS THEM? More like they need to start impressing us women so we can feel that there is actually men worth holding that burp in for at the dinner table.
Overall, femininity is a form of attitude. Act feminine and you are. It’s just that femininity can be a confusing subject. Girls are starting to be told from a young age of how a woman should act, and media is clearly not helping. I prefer to look in the mirror every day and be happy with what I see, and love the person that I am regardless of any “masculine” actions I make publicly or alone. I would not let it deteriorate me as a person, and will not be one to fight in hopes of reaching the expectations of modern societies definition of femininity.
Have you let your manly side come out lately, ladies?